She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Randomize
