i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
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