I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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