Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
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