I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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