um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
It's rum buckets o'clock
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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