"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
