You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
