would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
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