So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
