I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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