I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Randomize
