It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
whose parrot is this?
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Randomize
