No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
