How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Randomize