Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Randomize
