I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
