What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
