you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
