I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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