apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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