this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Randomize