Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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