hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Randomize
