I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
