five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I have feelings that need drinking.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
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