The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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