I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
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