The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Randomize
