It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize
