i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
