dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
This is classic penis vs brain.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize