Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize
