OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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