This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
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