so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize