can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Can I color on your dick again?
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
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