i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
