Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
I want you more than these girls want KFC
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Randomize
