I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
