I didn't shave. On purpose
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I seem to have left my pride at pride
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
