I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
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