are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Randomize
