You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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