DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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