i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
