Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Randomize
