The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Randomize
