For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
