I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Randomize
