I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Randomize